dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
