So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Randomize
