We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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