Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
