I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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