My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
ttyl tear gas
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
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