it wasn't lemon gatorade
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
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