is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
It's never too late to be topless.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize