Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
