It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
