Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
Randomize