my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize