no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
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