apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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