if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
Randomize
