I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Randomize
