I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
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