in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
they're like a gay fantastic four
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Randomize
