you guys were way drunker than both of me
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Randomize