You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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