I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
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