loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
