Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
That accounts for only three of the penises
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Randomize
