So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
then he tried to convert me to islam
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
Randomize
