FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
Randomize
