In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
