Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
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