Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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