I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
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