should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
