Small penises have feelings too.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
