This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize