I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
Randomize
