My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
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