You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
porn star boner night. come get it.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Randomize
