mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
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