Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
