I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize
