I am puke
I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize