what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
