I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
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