giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
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