I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
