he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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