escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Randomize
