I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
