okay pat passed out under dana's car
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
