I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
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