hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
So vagazzling was a success
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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