Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
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