My room smells like vodka and shame
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
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