Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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